the art of forgiveness

We will always be faced with people who challenge us. Who make us feel as if we are different than them. Better than them. Less than them. 

We will be lead into the lie of separation. 

When someone crosses us or behaves in a way that we deem wrong, hurtful, unjust, etc. it is so easy to cut them out. To say, "You are not welcome in my life anymore."

The door is closed.

Don't come back. 

And yet, when I have done this, I didn't do it with grace. I didn't do it with forgiveness or love in my heart and I know that many others have similar experiences. Holding resentments is a very easy thing to do; choosing to release someone through forgiveness is harder. 

And when I say forgiveness, I mean it in its entirety. I happen to journal every single night on my resentments and I find that a lot of subtle gripe energy can hang around. I sort of forgive people. I sort of move on. I sort of surrender. 

Recently I felt deeply hurt by something. It felt like one of the worst things another woman could have done to me and yet, I know that it is up to me to fully forgive her. It is also my responsibility to look at each and every way I contributed to what happened. To see where truth exists in her perspective. To see where I could have acted with more grace, more acceptance. And to take that insight with me as I proceed further. 

Those who hurt or challenge us the most are our greatest teachers. 

I am using this situation on as a push towards growth. As an opportunity to look at every single relationship that I still have resentment around. I will be working with an ancient Hawaiian practice called Ho’oponopono. I first learned of the meditation seven years ago, during my very first yoga retreat in Ojai. While I never really put it into practice, it has come up again and again over the years, and it seems like I need it now more than ever. 

I will be sharing this meditation and my experience around it in a future post. May we all find a little more room for true compassion and the softness needed to truly let go. 

Kenna ConwayComment