perfect timing

"It's all happening in perfect timing."

(Photo: Toby Harvard)

We have all heard that before, especially if you are an LAer. Versions with similar sentiments fill my Instagram feed. I hear it in yoga class, from friends, from my therapist. And I tell people something like it from time to time. 

And yet, sometimes I am still like, "but is it really??"

The idea that everything is happening for us. That all people/places/things show up in our reality with a meaning and purpose sounds great. It's like a cashmere sweater on a chilly day. Comforting. Warm. Luxurious, even. 

I say luxurious because if you are the kind of person who can accept this as true, you are lucky. For people who are living in third world countries or going through chemo- it might be harder to swallow. And being in a state of disbelief, in my opinion, is harder. From a spiritual standpoint, I view it all as karma. Lessons. Agreements that we came in with. When it comes to my personal life, I (try to) apply this motto- from the most mundane to the most tragic. But I am well aware that a lot do not. That it can all sound like new age bullshit. 

And I get it because sometimes I think it, too. Interestingly, I don't really question the bigger, more devastating events in my life. Maybe because I need to believe that these horrible things serve a purpose. That loved ones getting ill or experiencing profound loss and mind numbing depression isn't just a coincidence. Mere bad luck. The result of being a human being. It is more the not so important stuff in the grand scheme of things, like boys and items being stolen, that I struggle with. 

"So you're saying my favorite camera getting stolen at LAX is perfect? And that guy not calling me back is divine?"

"Exactly"

And sometimes I get on board. Sometimes I scoff and doubt. But in the end, I usually arrive to a place of believing. Acceptance. Letting go. Regardless of whether it was really all meant to be or not. It happened. It is what it is. And me rationalizing it, turning it into an argument against or for spiritual ideas, is just an energy loss. 

It may not be perfect. Or maybe it is. What I do know for sure is that holding onto a story or an emotion for too long has caused me a lot of internal strife. Acceptance is key. Surrender, too. All buzz words in the wellness world. Probably popping up in your newsfeed as I write this. At the end of the day, I do believe that most of what occurs is all part of a greater plan. But you don't have to. Sometimes I don't and it's all ok.

 

 

HealKenna Conway